Lancelot and the Wolf Page 15

  He smiled, all the patience in the world now in his face, “You don’t need too. I do, Merlin taught me as a child. Just as Else understands which is why she sent me with you.”

  I remembered what the fey witch said to me when she healed me and saved Else’s life. However, I’d become enchanted by that liaison, I had no wish to add to my troubles.

  “I am not fey, Lancelot,” Arthur said as though reading my thoughts. “It will not be the same. They just want us, they want our love for themselves. Give them this gift and we will be rewarded.”

  The hands worked on my skin and began to work between my legs. A hand, which had nothing to do with Arthur, cupped my balls and squeezed gently. I felt fingers beginning to burrow where fingers didn’t need to be, I threw back my head and groaned. Arthur took that as consent. He lowered his mouth to my neck and moved over my body. Slightly smaller and more lithe than I am, he nonetheless took the lead. His mouth captured mine quickly and I felt our tongues explore even as our cocks rubbed together, pressed tight to our bodies. I had wanted this for so long. My legs spread and wrapped tightly around Arthur’s. Our hips moved but we were so engrossed in exploring each other’s mouths we felt no need for more in that moment. He felt slick against my hard belly, despite the water. I had one hand on his backside, the other tangled in his hair.

  The water shifted around us, those small hands somehow came between our bodies. They moved up and down our shafts faster and firmer with each passing moment, even as we ground against each other. The wave, the desperate need inside me, built quickly.

  Arthur locked rigid in my arms, hard against me, his muscles cording in his chest and back. I pushed him tight against me. “Sorry, I can’t hold on,” he cried.

  He came hard, I forced him to kiss me and felt my own body crash into its long denied orgasm. I throbbed all over. Our juices mingled with the water and a hundred voices whispered benedictions over our heads while we held each other. Then they were gone. So was my support.

  Water rushed into my mouth and up my nose. I thrashed to find the floor of the pool. Arthur grabbed my arm and pulled me up his own legs more confident as he’d been on top of me.

  Spluttering I surfaced, “What the hell?” I exclaimed.

  “Their idea of a joke,” Arthur grinned, brushing back my hair. I heard the laughter.

  “Some fucking joke,” I muttered.

  “Come, let me help you out of this damned pool and we’ll dry off,” Arthur took my hand and led me from the water. He sat me by my clothes and handed me my cloak. He sat beside me, “Are you all right?” he asked. I heard a tremor in his voice.

  I looked at him, he looked well, really well. Better than I’d seen him in years. I smiled at him and he smiled back. “Thank heaven for that, I was worried you’d be furious with me,” he exclaimed.

  I frowned, “Why?”

  “Lancelot, I know how I’ve felt about you since we were boys, but I couldn’t know you would feel the same way,” Arthur dried himself slowly not really looking at me.

  I reached out and took his hand. Bringing it to my lips, I kissed his knuckles, scarred and calloused like mine. “Arthur, I have craved your touch forever. Cutting me off from your love has to be the hardest burden you ever placed on my shoulders. Even if this never happens again, I can live with the knowledge that as men we loved as passionately as we did when we were curious boys.”

  “More, Lancelot, I love you more now, than I did when we were boys. Then it was a game, now I know I mean every damned word.” Tears stood proud in his eyes. I moved toward him and we kissed more gently, our passion spent for the moment.

  “Hopeless bloody romantics the pair of us,” I muttered as I pulled back. I’d begun to grow hard again and although we shared something unique in that pool, I didn’t feel ready for more right now. Not emotionally. I needed to be grounded and certain before we took this any further, if we took this further.

  Arthur punched me lightly, “You are the romantic, I’m a king. I don’t have time for sentiment.”

  I shivered. Arthur moved instantly, “Come, you need to dress. You’ve had a hard few days and I’ve not made it any easier.”

  “Any idea who has been poisoning you?” I asked. He helped to dress me as if he were my squire. He knelt before me and laced my boots. Then rose and lay a kiss on my lips before moving to his clothes.

  “No, but I have a few ideas. Right now we need to find the others and then really look for Merlin,” he said.

  I realised night had almost gobbled up the day. We’d been at the pool for hours. “Can you find the others?” I asked, picking up our weapons.

  “I know where they will be,” he said. “Ash will be with them too.”

  “How do you know?”

  He smiled, “Although I am not fey, like Else, I know them and they know me. Being trapped in Camelot meant I forgot how to feel them, sense them, even use them to help me. Now I am more myself than I have been for years. Come, it’s this way,” he took my hand and led me from the steaming pool.

  We left the grove and the temperature dropped. Exhaustion stole my thoughts, control over my body and my awareness. Arthur was right; I’d been through too much over the last few days. Just as I saw the fire ahead of us, Arthur stopped me.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Geraint,” he said.

  I grunted, “Else.”

  “She will know,” Arthur said.

  I thought about that and realised he was right, she would know. How would she react?

  “Geraint will be fine,” I said. “Just don’t make it obvious. He knows what kind of love we share.” Although he’d never said anything.

  Arthur stole the opportunity to take my face in his hands, “I do love you, Lancelot and I am sorry for all the hurt I have caused.”

  “We have hurt each other, Arthur. Let’s call it even between us and be done with the past once and for all.” I kissed his mouth. His lips parted and we embraced once more. He melted into my body and I knew I would ache for him forever if I didn’t complete this game and own him completely. Could my life become any more complicated?

  We relinquished the kiss, paused to calm ourselves and walked into the camp. I realised, as I saw Else stand, I hadn’t needed her all afternoon. That felt good and bad all at once. Geraint almost tripped over himself to reach Arthur, she walked straight to me.

  Else hugged me tight, before rising on her toes and planting a kiss on my mouth. My surprise and the zing between us made my heart stutter. She grinned, “I can taste him on your lips,” she said quietly. “I am glad for you both.”

  I opened my mouth and closed it as she vanished from my side to go and hug Arthur. He returned the hug and the kiss she gave him. Geraint looked surprised, first at them, then at me.

  “Don’t worry about it,” I said, too confused and tired to care. Just be glad we were all safe and whole, at long last.

  That night I slept alone on the cold ground but Arthur and Else shared my camp. We’d eaten well and we felt safe enough this close to home not to have to set watch. At one point, someone curled around my back and held me but my exhaustion kept me docile and my comforter remained anonymous.

  CHAPTER TWENTY ONE

  The sound of swords clashing woke me in an instant. I reached for my own weapon but a small hand clamped tight on mine. “Slow down, soldier, they are sparring,” Else said laughing. “You look like a mole emerging from a hill. Good sleep?”

  I blinked heavily and took a deep breath, trying to orientate myself. “What’s happening?” my voice sounded thicker than normal. I had been deeply asleep.

  “Geraint and Arthur are sparring. It seems he uses the same techniques as you when he needs to regain his self control,” Else rose and fetched me water, bread and cheese.

  I turned in my sleeping roll and watched them fight. They must have been at it for a while. Both men were naked to the waist and covered in sweat. My body reacted to watching Arthur fight. I coughed and forced my eyes away, toward
Else. She grinned at me, making me blush.

  “I don’t blame you, I’m not certain I’d be able to resist that,” she said eyeing Arthur.

  “Else,” I still didn’t understand what had happened the day before. “I think we need to talk. I’ve done something and I don’t think you are going to be happy about it.”

  Else turned her head to me as though looking at me not Arthur became almost too much effort, “If you’re talking about you and Arthur making love don’t worry.”

  I frowned, “Don’t worry? Is that it? So I can have sex with whom I choose and you don’t care?” I remembered she hadn’t ever actually agreed to marry me.

  Else sighed and turned toward me completely, her back to the fighting, “Look, our lives are not really our own, not right now. I sent you with Arthur knowing full well what would happen. The two of you ached for each other so badly the air was thick around you as soon as we reached Camelot. I am not completely human, Lancelot, things like true love flow differently for me. What you and Arthur have is so special I’m not going to stand in the way.”

  “I love you,” I said weakly, even more confused after her explanation.

  She smiled and sat beside me, the magic flowed when she grasped my hand. It rippled gently for a change. “You see,” she said. “The magic likes your ties to Arthur.”

  I frowned, “He’s going to suffer like I did from the spell?”

  “No, but he is being tied to you through bonds as firm as any between two people who are finally allowing themselves to be happy.”

  “But I love you,” I insisted.

  “I know,” she said. “But you can’t have me right now.”

  “Hey, you woke up,” Arthur called. “Come fight, Geraint is blowing like an old horse.”

  “He’s being evil, Lancelot,” Geraint yelled. “I think he’s cheating but I can’t work out how.”

  I rose on strings, pulled by the opportunity to fight Arthur as his friend and equal. Everything vanished from my mind by the feel of my sword in my hand and the brisk breeze filling my lungs. This was peace for me, this was happiness.

  Geraint soon quit the field. Even with my help he’d had enough. Arthur had pushed him for over an hour already apparently. I’d slept through everything. I faced Arthur and we fought with joy, not desperation. Every muscle in me sang in harmony as we moved back and forth across the glade. His eyes shone in the morning light and he didn’t stop laughing.

  “Alright, I yield,” he finally said. His arms shook with the exertion he’d put himself through. I’d knocked him over, so I reached down and hauled him to his feet. He sprang up, surprising me and we over balanced, stumbling backward slightly. He ended up nose to nose with me. “Oh, right now I wish we didn’t have an audience,” he murmured.

  I laughed, the heat rising in my cheeks. He released me. I’d become sixteen all over again.

  We ate, packed the camp up and finally moved back to the road. Four happy people, if a little confused. At least I was confused. Else and Arthur seemed perfectly content as they rode together.

  “So where are we actually heading?” Geraint asked.

  “Avalon,” Arthur said turning in his saddle. “The Sisters of Avalon should be able to tell us more about Merlin’s whereabouts. Else and I have no idea where he is, but if the Court is under a spell, or the de Clare’s are, then we need him.”

  “When was the last time you saw him?” I asked.

  “He was in the company of a very beautiful young woman he’d been training,” Arthur said. “So I assume something happened because that was five years ago.”

  “He left me in Europe five years ago,” Else said.

  That’s when I’d had the affair with Guinevere, I thought. Is that when the rot set in? When Merlin left us? Did Arthur’s enemies finally have the access they needed because the old man wasn’t there to hold them back? I hated to think we had all been manipulated that badly.

  We travelled quickly through Arthur’s lands. We rode with mountains rising in the distance on our left and the sea glittering on our right. The day proved kind, with a sharp breeze but blue skies, kissed by large white clouds. Once more, we avoided towns and villages, we still carried plenty of food and taking Arthur anywhere tended to complicate things. People just seemed to know who he was. We could have been any group of friends travelling together but there is something about Arthur, which makes him a king even to the lowliest of his subjects. Our conversations, when we walked the horses, were light hearted and reconnected us through our shared memories as we regaled Else with stories.

  We rode a long way that day and reached the grounds of a mighty Abbey. A brief debate occurred between seeking the beds in monks’ cells and beds in the open with no rules. We opted for freedom. We found a large clearing in a wood by a river and set up quickly with the night already sweeping the day from the sky. I helped Else with the horses, while Arthur and Geraint collected firewood. Then she and I made dinner. A full, thick potage and hunks of bread kept us content. I wished briefly for a drink but then looked at Arthur and decided I didn’t need it that badly.

  I did however need Else. We’d been separated all day by the others through one thing or another. My hands shook and my belly burned. Arthur and Geraint were talking quietly about some new laws and taxes Arthur had inflicted on his people while he’d been under the influence. Geraint tried to tell him he’d gone too far.

  “Else,” I said quietly. “I need you.”

  She looked up from the fire. The glow warmed her skin and made her eyes almost black in the reflection. My breath caught, my chest tightened. She’d never looked more like a being from another world. She smiled, lay down the stick she’d been poking into the flames and rose.

  “Are you alright?” Arthur asked me.

  “I’m fine,” I said biting back a groan. Geraint fell quiet and my companions watched as Else sat between my knees, her back me. She took my hands, peeled my gloves off and pulled her shirt up, laying my hands on her belly. Her skin felt hot, she squirmed until she leaned into my chest. I kissed her hair.

  “That sort of looks like fun and sort of looks like hell,” Geraint said frowning.

  I chuckled, “It sort of feels like that.” My voice softened, becoming breathy. The magic flowed and I sank into Else the only way I could. I closed my eyes and breathed in her scent.

  “Is there anything I can do to help?” Arthur’s voice sounded strange. I opened my eyes and stared across the fire at him. His gaze shone with hunger. Even with Else in my arms, my body pounded with need for Arthur.

  Else stirred against me and said, “Just being here helps, Arthur. He will need you when I move from his arms. The first hour afterward can be hard, we haven’t been together for long enough over many days.”

  Arthur glanced at Geraint. He glanced at me. I didn’t know what to say. Nothing had been said which made life difficult. We just needed to know if Geraint could deal with us being more obvious. He shrugged, “Well, it’d be a nice change if the two of you are able to be honest with each other.”

  Else rose in one smooth movement and vanished from my hands and body. I felt her imprint on me and her heat. The spell back lashed and I groaned. Arthur moved around the fire quickly. I curled into a ball. He took hold of my shoulders and pulled me close to his chest. His strong arms coaxed my head down onto his lap. He stroked my head and held my hands as I shook.

  “You dealt with this alone?” Geraint asked shocked at the effects.

  “Sometimes,” I said through the shaking, “this is worse than others. I’ve not been hit this badly in a while.”

  “They want me to join with you and Arthur,” Else said coldly. She stood staring into the fire, the flames coloured her hair red on the tips. Wild and curling around her face. “I am to plant the spell in Arthur, they can use what happened yesterday between you to finalise it.”

  All eyes focused on Else. I said calmly, “What will happen if you don’t?”

  She turned to look at me, wh
ere I lay, “You will suffer, you will be used to punish me.”

  “How do you know?” Arthur said.

  She poked the fire with her foot, “I can hear my sisters and cousins through that.”

  “Then we do it,” Arthur said. “You do whatever you need to take the pain from Lancelot.”

  “No,” I said. “Arthur, I cannot allow you to be enslaved by this. You need to think clearly, not be trapped by the damned fey and their desires. Your priority is to your people not them. We don’t know their agenda, not completely.”

  “You are no use to me if you are broken like this,” he said kindly, hooking hair out of my face.

  “Lancelot is right, Arthur,” Geraint said. “I like you, girl,” he said to Else, “but I don’t trust this magic of yours.”

  “Neither do I,” said Else.

  “All we need to do is control the desire the same way you do with Lancelot. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing.” Arthur said.

  Else turned to him, “It might just be that now, but it could be so much more if they choose it to be. Lancelot can bear the pain and I will do all I can to help. I don’t want to do this.”

  “You mean you don’t want me?” Arthur said. I heard a bitterness I didn’t understand in his words.

  “I don’t want to hurt you the way I am hurting him,” Else said.

  “I’m going on first watch,” Geraint said, rising and walking into the woods toward the road. Magic confused and upset him. Although not as practical as Kay, Geraint did not live a life where fey should be so real.

  Else moved off toward the horses, “Just hold him, Arthur, you should be able to ease his pain if you remain close.”

  Arthur moved his bedroll, we didn’t talk. I don’t think either of us knew what to say. To ease this he’d have to make love to Else and become as entangled with her as I had, not a helpful thought. He lay his kit down, took off my thick cloak and placed it over my blankets. Then he forced me down, wriggled his hand under my clothes and placed his hand on my belly. He stroked me until my breathing started to ease. We were tightly spooned under a thick layer of blankets and I began to calm. He kissed my cheek. I turned my head and kissed his mouth. The kiss grew deep and long.